Thursday, July 29, 2010

Food Can Not Define Me....

So, I have a slight problem. I love the taste of food, most food. I often find myself stuffing my face and stomach with 2nds and 3rds. Even though I never need it, but I want it. It is an addiction. One I don't talk about ever, in fact, I never realized how addicted I was before reflecting on my eating behaviors of the past 8 years or so. I look back at my eating habits and think what the heck have I been doing? No wonder I am stuck at the weight I am. When Love and I go out to eat, I eat my whole plate. It's surprising I don't lick the effing thing. I thought about this a lot today. Sometimes I feel obsessed with food, like it somehow defines the person I am. Sometimes I eat like the overweight person that I was. Others, I eat the amount for the thinner, more fit woman I am these days.

Tonight, I wanted to eat like the woman I was just over a year ago. I will tell you what when I show you my dinner.

Breakfast was the typical strawberries, blueberries, greek yogurt, fiber one, and a scoop of almond butter.
Started with a spinach salad topped with roasted squash and zucchini....look familiar?
Steak sandwich with the leftover 2 oz. steak sliced. Topped with some mayo and mustard.
"Dessert" was a half a cup of strawberries.
On my way home from work I had a Oats & Chocolate fiber one bar. It was amazing.

 The healthy tostada. The tortilla is a low carb, high fiber 50 calorie tortilla with a sprinkle of cheese, a big scoop of beans, 85/15 grass fed hamburger meat and
peach and mango salsa on the side.

I really really wanted another one. So, I walked over and grabbed for the tortilla bag and thought, 'What makes you want this? The fat girl that loved to eat, just to eat? That is not happening, because you are not that person anymore. You are learning and healing from your addiction.' I put the tortilla down and felt so good about my little mental talk. I feel like I am making a breakthrough in my fight against fat. I am learning that food DOES NOT DEFINE WHO I AM, ONLY WHO I WAS. I am living a healthy, happier life and my strength is what is helping define the new me!

What have you learned about your eating habits? And what do you feel defines you?

P.S. I completed Day 8 of the 30 day shred, I haven't gotten this far yet!

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