The Plan and The Actual

The Plan:

Breakfast-Oatmeal with pumpkin and 1/2 a banana. 

Snack-Other 1/2 of banana

Lunch-Salad with leftover pasta and a jello cup

Snack-Grapes and a Cheese Stick

Dinner-Chicken burritos(My Favorite Homemade Meal :) with a salad

Desert-Pumpkin Chocolate Chips

Actual:
Breakfast-Oatmeal with pumpkin and 1/2 a banana
Snack-None
Lunch-Salad, Leftover Pasta, Jello, and a Cheese Stick
Snack-2 Clementines
Snack Again-2 Pumpkin Cookies and 1 Thumbprint cookie
Dinner-2 Chicken Burritos
Desert-Nana

So, my eating on Monday was a little out of whack. I am not happy about it per se, but it is a choice. So, I will do better today and control myself around the cookies(love love love them!!)

Taking It Back.....

It's been forever since I have been here for a true post! I am sooo very sorry(to those who care haha). We're going to cover a lot in this post:

• What I have been up to....non healthy lifestyle related
• What I have been up to.....healthy lifestyle related
• Weight Loss goals!
• Goals in general
• Skinny Days vs. Fat Days

First up, What I have been up to...non healthy lifestyle related:

I went camping 2 weekends ago and it consisted of a LOT of Jager and Rockstars, which I followed up with some cigars and even cigarettes(BARF!). Tangent: I smoked from age 12-18 on and off. Once I turned 19, I was a 1-2 pack a day smoker. Yeah, I was that girl. I was overweight, ate fast food 2-3 times a day, smoked like a chimney, and drank my body weight in liquor. Then, I met Love and that all changed. I have been smoke free(minus the camping trip) for 2 years. End Tangent! I have been working 3 night shifts and one weekend shift at the part time gig. The money is not a necessity per se, I am saving just in case. On my days off from the part time gig, I clean! It's becoming hard to keep up with it. So, I have obviously been crazy busy and let blogging/commenting fall to the wayside. I do read blogs, but do it on my phone and most sites I can't comment on....so, just know I am keeping up :)

What I have been up to.....healthy lifestyle related:

I have been making pretty good food choices, however the portion sizes have been WAY off! Sunday I was up 6 pounds from 3 weeks ago and I believe it. Tomorrow I will weigh in and see how that goes. I am saying a little prayer for sure. With the working/cleaning/camping schedule, I have not had much time to work out. I do 10 minutes even if that is all I have, but didn't workout at all for over a week....so bad! I am trying to pick myself up and move forward.

Weight Loss goals!:

I was at 130 on Sunday and am sooo upset with myself for that. I want to be at 110. That means 20 pounds to lose and it is tough! I am going to give up the scale the whole month of October and see where I am at after the half marathon on the 30th. I am getting my eating/portions back on track and I am getting my cute ass to goal!

Goals in general:

I had originally planned to run the halloween half marathon in under 2 hrs and 10 minutes, however I have slacked in the training department. So, I am just aiming for better than 2 hrs and 16 minutes(the time of my first half). I started my training schedule on Sunday which is 4 weeks later than I had planned. So, I am hoping that the pain of the past 2 runs goes away and I get my fitness back up to par ASAP! Another goal I would like to achieve is get on a strength training schedule. I need some muscles.

As I mentioned above, I began 1/2 marathon training on Sunday. I decided 6 miles was a good amount to shoot for. Mile 1 & 2 were a little tough...I was mentally there, but physically I wasn't feeling great. Miles 3 & 4 rocked! I was cruising and really found my groove! Miles 5&6 I constantly repeated "I am taking it back!" "I am taking my health and fitness back!" "I took the time off and now I have to push to get it back!" "You can do it, you are doing great!"! I finished in 1:03:48s. Which is great for me considering that I haven't run that far since April! It feels good to be back to running! Just gotta stay mentally strong!

Today, I ran 3.5ish miles because my Garmin was being stupid! Check out the sweat on my back and post workout glow!

Today, I ate very well:
Breakfast: Blueberries, Pineapple, Greek Yogurt, and Fiber One cereal.
Lunch: Chicken & Pepper wrap with baked BBQ chips(Not horrible, but my carrots went bad and my tummy was begging for the chips)
Dinner..In Pictures!

I started with 2 handfuls of lettuce.

Add cooked chicken and peppers. Top with Poppyseed dressing!

And  VOILA...a DELICIOUS salad!

I have been having skinny days this week and it is soooo frustrating because I see the change in my body, but then I wake up and I see the 175 pound girl again! It is sooooo frustrating!

Do You Have Skinny Days? How Do You Deal With Fat Days?

Food Can Not Define Me....

So, I have a slight problem. I love the taste of food, most food. I often find myself stuffing my face and stomach with 2nds and 3rds. Even though I never need it, but I want it. It is an addiction. One I don't talk about ever, in fact, I never realized how addicted I was before reflecting on my eating behaviors of the past 8 years or so. I look back at my eating habits and think what the heck have I been doing? No wonder I am stuck at the weight I am. When Love and I go out to eat, I eat my whole plate. It's surprising I don't lick the effing thing. I thought about this a lot today. Sometimes I feel obsessed with food, like it somehow defines the person I am. Sometimes I eat like the overweight person that I was. Others, I eat the amount for the thinner, more fit woman I am these days.

Tonight, I wanted to eat like the woman I was just over a year ago. I will tell you what when I show you my dinner.

Breakfast was the typical strawberries, blueberries, greek yogurt, fiber one, and a scoop of almond butter.
Lunch

Started with a spinach salad topped with roasted squash and zucchini....look familiar?

Steak sandwich with the leftover 2 oz. steak sliced. Topped with some mayo and mustard.
"Dessert" was a half a cup of strawberries.
On my way home from work I had a Oats & Chocolate fiber one bar. It was amazing.

Dinner

 The healthy tostada. The tortilla is a low carb, high fiber 50 calorie tortilla with a sprinkle of cheese, a big scoop of beans, 85/15 grass fed hamburger meat and

peach and mango salsa on the side.

I really really wanted another one. So, I walked over and grabbed for the tortilla bag and thought, 'What makes you want this? The fat girl that loved to eat, just to eat? That is not happening, because you are not that person anymore. You are learning and healing from your addiction.' I put the tortilla down and felt so good about my little mental talk. I feel like I am making a breakthrough in my fight against fat. I am learning that food DOES NOT DEFINE WHO I AM, ONLY WHO I WAS. I am living a healthy, happier life and my strength is what is helping define the new me!

What have you learned about your eating habits? And what do you feel defines you?

P.S. I completed Day 8 of the 30 day shred, I haven't gotten this far yet!

Gusto Lost!

So, I keep promising food blogging follow through, but have failed miserably. I feel like if I don't report or take a picture, it didn't happen. I can not continue to do that because it isn't helping me lose any of this last 17 pounds. Speaking of which...

127.2 is what the scale said yesterday. To say I feel awful is an understatement. That is a 2.9 pound gain and that crap ends there. I will not continue going up. I WILL NOT!

So, I rededicate my life to myself. I will get to my goal and I will be successful. I bought a new notebook and have a pretty pen to write down food, water, bowel movements(I can tell a lot by how many BM's I am having), and my daily to do lists for cleaning and such. I feel it will help me to get more in touch with myself. From my body to my mind. I love lists and this will help :)

Now that that is said....let's get onto my clean clean eats for today :)

Breakfast

Looked like this, except with blueberries and original fiber one cereal.

Lunch

.

Spinach salad with 1 small cucumber, 5 grape tomatoes, roasted squash and peach and mango salsa on top. On the side was a cheese stick and dessert was grapes(no pics, sorry).

Dinner

My lover made me a great steak. I had a 3 oz. cooked portion. We buy our beef from a local butcher and it is grass fed. I can totally tell the difference in the taste and quality of the meat. On the side I had zucchini and salad with poppy seed dressing.

Then, Love and I took the pups on a walk.

Here is my baby girl and I. It was a touch windy so I have that crazy hair in my eyes.

My boys.

When we got home it was time for dessert.

 Frozen Yogurt. It is a small cup for only 150 calories and yummy blueberries on top. Not so clean, but eh...I can limit what is clean and what isn't.

I will be back tomorrow...........I PROMISE.......I PROMISE MYSELF!!

Pandora Lover!

I am addicted to my Rihanna station on Pandora today. It made the Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred fly by this morning. I loved it. It was harder today as I am still SUPER sore from doing it(and the dancing I did at the concert).

Today was a good day all around. Work was slow in the morning, but picked up a little in the afternoon. I love busy days at work, because they fly by. I am one of those lucky people that love their jobs(most of the time). I have obstacles to overcome, but every time I find solutions to problems, I feel that much stronger and more qualified at my job.

I came home and fell asleep immediately. My sleeping schedule has been all over the place the last few months. I can't fall asleep, but once I do I am O-U-T. Then, I can't hardly wake up. Therefore, no gym in the morning. That will change once half marathon training starts. If I don't have a treadmill by then, I will be getting up at 4:30 to hit the gym in the morning.

On to the eats for today...

Breakfast

The usual greek yogurt, blueberries, strawberries, and fiber one cereal :)

Snack

Banana...I got a picture of it today.

Lunch

A side salad with french beans, spinach, and grape tomatoes. The main course was 1 cup of my yummy homemade chili. I rock at making that chili, I tell ya. I put some plain greek yogurt and a little sprinkle of cheese on top. It was awesome.

Desert

My tummy was craving something sweet, so I had a fiber one bar for desert.

Dinner

A serving of penne rosa(I love the veggies in it) with a piece of pita bread. Holy yum!

Desert #2

The cupcakes I made turned out SO GOOD. I rarely bake anything, but when I do, I definitely enjoy it. Love enjoys it also.

On a sidenote, I have been doing great with my water intake. I have exceeded my 128 oz. of water for the past 2 days. Thanks to the 2 8 oz. glasses of water in the morning. I feel more energized and awake all day.

Do you use pandora? What is your favorite station?

Sorry For Leaving You Hanging....

All Weekend!!!! Ahhh. Let's just say, I am not talking about the weekend. Food was AWESOME. Exercise non existent, still struggling with knee pain. Taking my running shoes to the running store and they are going to do what they can to help me!

Plans for the half marathon have changed. I am no longer doing the Salt Lake Half Marathon, at this point. I may change my mind, and I really hope I do. Being injured is terrifying to me, so I want to be certain I am ready physically for it. Mentally, I am ready. I am still planning on the "Happy Valley Half Marathon"(I can't think of the real name of the race, but Happy Valley sounds like sunshine and rainbows anyways). and that is in June. So, I AM going to run it. Or maybe I will still do both....ugh...see back and forth back and forth! lol!

I still don't have a full functioning kitchen, but it is back to normal enough that I am staying on track :) When we started this remodel, I was determined to not eat out nearly as much as The Boy suggested we would have to! I really didn't eat out as much as I thought I would. Sure, last week we did, but this weekend I think we ate out 2 times. I had a cheeseburger from McDonald's last night.....Shhh...no telling ahah. I don't feel badly because I did have just 1 and 4 fries. Then, an apple and scoop of PB for desert. That's fine by me!

Todays eats:
B-1/2 cup of oatmeal, 2/3 cup of water, 1/4 cup low fat milk, 2 scoops PB, Sprinkle of Fiber One Cereal, and 1 scoop of protein powder. It was just okay. I need to work on the consistency and NOT eating it 10 minutes after it's made-COLD AND GOOEY...Gross!

L-Salad made with 2 cups of salad, 1/4 cucumber, 1/4 yellow pepper(I can eat them like apples...so perfect!), 1/4 cup of broccoli, 1 Avocado, Mrs. Dash garlic and herb NO SALT ADDED seasoning, 10 sprays of 2 calorie per spray ranch, and a half cup of fiber one cereal. On the side, I had 1/3 of a Starkist herb and garlic Tuna pouch. It was tasty and very filling!

There are 3 new things I tried today, and wanted to give a little review of:
1. Fiber One cereal-This has 60 calories per 1/2 cup and 57% of the daily fiber suggested. Can you believe it? Those are some good stats. The Boy had a huge(probably a cup and a half) serving last night(to cure his sweet tooth!?) and he was *ahem* "feeling" it this morning. The needed potty break woke him up 30 minutes before he usually gets up. Being one that used to never getting enough fiber in my diet, this stuff is going to be a new staple :)
2. Starkist garlic and herb tuna pouch-I always thought I NEEDED mayo(Lots, please!) to make tuna taste really good, but in the past few months, I have done a little honey mustard and  a touch of mayo and it has been great. Today, I ate the tuna plain. No added spices, nothing. It was delicious. It didn't have an over powering garlic flavor, but it definitely added a little something to the tuna. You will see this in the future.
3. Mrs. Dash Garlic and Herb seasoning-I worry about sodium intake, not a ton, but I do think about it. This flavoring was great. I used to be a HUGE RANCH FAN, like huge. It went on every salad and it was about 10 times the serving size suggestion. Last night, I smushed(love this word!) an avocado on a paper plate and threw some of this seasoning on and voila, a nice creamy add to a salad. Although, I did add a little ranch, because the avocado wasn't getting the salad very "wet" at all. Weirdo...yes I am!

All 3 of the suggestions above came from a girl that works at the kiosk across from me at the part time gig in the mall! Love her!

So, there you go! What are some new things you have tried lately?

Level 2! Week 2! Eats!

First things first, I just got done doing level 2 of the 30 Day Shred and I AM IN LOVE!!! It is so much better than level 1! I do believe it will be my favorite!! I am taking my starting measurements tonight! Speaking of measurements, I measured my tummy at the belly button and have lost 1 inch in about a month!! Go me!

Week 2 of half marathon training was great! The tempo run was good, although I need better treadmill music! What is/are your favorite workout song(s)? I did some walking/eliptical/stair stepper/bike for cross training 1 day and it was nice to switch it up! The 6 mile run, as you probably read below was so amazing! I came home enthused, but exhausted! I laid down(I got up at 6 AM Saturday morning and cleaned/made breakfast from 6 til about 11) to try and take a nap, but the runner's high took over me! I couldn't sleep and was up until 3:00AM. I love love love running and I used to love love love sleeping, but now my energy level is high and I feel more alive every day! Goodbye naps, Hello Life :) I am so motivated and I only grow more motivated by the day!!! :)

Now, on to the eats from Saturday! I had an exceptional eating day that day. The morning started out with cleaning, a run to the grocery store and then it was coffee time!

 

 My coffee is typically with 1 tblsp fat free coconut creme creamer and a splash of milk.

I got hungry at about 9:00 and decided to try some eggs with spinach and mushrooms. I had a kiwi on the side!

 

I loved the spinach and mushrooms sauteed in a tsp of olive oil.

After my run, I came home to a protein shake....made with Jay Robbs' vanilla protein powder, water, and a banana!

I was starving at around 9 Saturday night and decided to have a bean and cheese burrito(whole wheat 100 calorie tortilla) with a side of broccoli topped with cheese.

 

 I also had a make your own frozen yogurt, but ate about 10 small bites and put the rest of it in the freezer. Love ate the rest the next day(I had a few bites too).

Todays eats were awesome.

Breakfast was pb and banana sandwich on a whole wheat arnold sandwich thin and a cup of coffee with creamer and milk.

Lunch was a salad with mango vinigarette for starters. Then, I made spaghetti squash and topped it with spaghetti sauce with protein soy crumbles(saw this product in the skinny girl cookbook) and cheese. It was sooooo good!! I could hardly tell the "meat" wasn't real meat. 

Afternoon snack was a cup of fruit. 

Dinner was rice and chicken with a tapioca cup for desert. YUM!!

I have had about 100 oz of water so far today and should get in about 28 more before bed.

I am so excited for my weigh in on Thursday morning. I will be at 125 or below :)

Thanksgiving Weekend...

Can I just say, I didn't totally blow my lifestyle change this weekend, but I wasn't always very good.

Thanksgiving morning started with a half of a clif bar and a lot of water. Then, I went and ran my the "Utah Human Race 2009" at 8AM. I ran it in 32:21! Which is awesome for me. The last 5k I participated in took me 40 minutes or so to finish. Now, 3 years later and finishing in 32 minutes is a huge accomplishment. After the race, I went to my dad's house and talked to him while drinking about 3 cups of coffee!! Then, home to clean the house. I am NEVER hungry after coffee at all! So, I didn't eat until dinner. We had Babe's work friend over for Thanksgiving. Babe's friend that lives with us also joined in on the Thanksgiving festivities at our casa....he actually made the stuffing and yams! Dinner was divine and followed with banana cream pie. Then, the boys all had a drinking fest, which I did not take part in as I had to work at 8AM the next day.

Friday morning, I woke up showered and went to work. Worked from 8-4 and had an 8 piece chicken meal with fruit and diet lemonade. Then came home and got ready to go to my grandma's house. Had a yummy meal there, but my eyes were bigger than my stomach and I only ate 1/2 of what I got :) Plus had a piece of yummy chocolate pie :) Then, home to hang out with Babe, little brother and his girlfriend. Babe and Little Bro get along so well, it's awesome. Plus, they remind me a lot of each other.

Saturday was up for work again from 8-4. Had a turkey, sage and cream cheese bagel for brunch. Then, babe and I went to see his cousins new house. Had Pei Wei for dinner....it was TO DIE FOR!!

Today, Babe's dad had Thanksgiving at his house(he just recovered from 12 days of the swine flu!). Dinner was amazing, but not eating all day today made my tummy a lot smaller than it is. So, I didn't eat much. Then we came home and I made spaghetti using "squash" for my lunches this week! Soo yummy! I had a couple of strings for a taste test! Such a delicious lunch it will be :)  I did get in a 4 mile run today, as well!

This weekend I had 2 days where I didn't eat much and that is a huge NO NO!! I have to remind myself that just because I don't have an appetite, doesn't mean I should eat nothing....Ugh! So, I'm back on the lifestyle change hardcore this week lol :)

Happy Belated Thanksgiving!

A weeks worth of words...

Coming up with some inspiration to write these days is far and in between! I'm exhausted this week. Emotionally, physically, mentally, and "weatherly"! It snowed on Monday, and Tuesday. However, it didn't stick to the ground. It's gone now and it's just cold out. I hate being cold!! It's the worst, but I am thankful that I have a warm bed to sleep in every night and a handsome man to warm me up when I get home from work ;)

Exercise wise, I'm not doing fabulous, but not terrible. Skipped running Tuesday and Wednesday. I'm going everyday the rest of the week and also doing the "30 day shred" twice a day to get caught up to where I should be for "Operation 4 by 11/24". I don't think i'll be a size 4 by then, but i'm going to push myself HARD!! I'm getting a treadmill from Loves brother, but I have to replace the "motherboard"...it's 100 bucks! I hate paying it, but at least I don't have to buy a new treadmill for 800, right? I'm so excited to bring my running inside though, for real!

Food wise: I've been decent. Not great, but decent. Lots of fruits and veggies. Lots of chicken. Some enchiladas(I know!!). Not many sweets at all, which are my number one weakness!

Family wise: My parent's divorce is a soap opera! I often say "These Are The Days of Our Lives", very dramatically with a thick accent! I wish they'd just get divorced and my mom would tell someone the truth instead of feeding us full of BS!!

To my readers: I am still reading all of your posts! However, I haven't had much to say lately! Comments will resume ASAP!

Stay tuned for a better post....Tonight, the story of my weight!